NBC Embarrasses the National Hockey League

I nearly threw up in my mouth Saturday afternoon when Bill Clement came on TV before the overtime started between the Senators and the Sabres and told me to "enjoy the horse race".

Of course, NBC decided to throw the OT to Versus so that they could start their OVER AN HOUR LONG pregame show for the freaking Preakness Stakes. Seeing so many midgets in brightly-colored silks made me think that I must've have been tripping into Disco Night at the Manhole. Luckily, nbcsports.com had a banner instructing us to go to Versus for the overtime of a hotly-contested conference final that just might have sent one of the teams playing into the Stanley Cup Finals.

But, you know, we need OVER AN HOUR OF A PREGAME SHOW FOR AN EFFING HORSE RACE! Race itself: minute or two. Pregame show: seventy minutes. Bob Costas sightings: way too many for family audiences.

Look, this boils down rather simply. NBC pays big bucks to show these freaking white people cheering neon midgets on horseback and they split the costs and profits with the NHL for the games. Accounting-wise, it was an easy decision. Viewer wise it probably was fairly easy too. But you'd think that the network that was hosed by the infamous "Heidi Game" in the 1960s would have learned that no matter what, they need to stick with the game at hand. This is not the XFL cutting into J-Lo on SNL; this is the freaking National Hockey League! It's almost ONE HUNDRED YEARS OLD! I could see if the Ghost of Barbaro (TM) had entered the race--then it would be big news. Lord knows that some Americans have turned that freaking horse into a cross between Dale Earnhardt and Elvis; which makes me sick.


So instead of Dave Strader and Eddie O we get the old AFL guy in a lime green tie; Weeman after he raided Barry Melrose's wardrobe; and the fug-smuckerest of all the fug smuckers, Bob Costas. Flowers. White people who are rich. White people in strange hats. Horses wearing socks like Pete Maravich. Stupid, stupid crap.

On this one, I say that we have to blame the NHL. They know that NBC are bastards. NBC milked "Friends" a year longer than they needed to. They cancelled "Andy Barker PI" after giving it like no shot to succeed. And now, every NHL fan knows that we all rank lower than horse racing on the television food chain. As if we all needed another groin shot at this point of the game.